live.love.laugh.

Dagmara Almand


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Choices?…

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I came across two stories recently that make such a poignant remark about life choices.

In the first a woman’s husband pocket calls her while on a date with his mistress. From the call she learns all she needs to.
So she decides to take her life back. She finds  e-mails between her husband and mistress and sends them to the mistress’ husband.  She confronts her husband with the affair and shows him downloaded proof. She wants to takes her life back. She wants to be strong.
They try therapy, conversations, family trips in hopes of saving their marriage. But she wants him to confess and make amends. He doesn’t. He is in love with his mistress. It’s over.
imagesThe other story starts out in much the same way.  A husband comes home and tells his wife he is having an affair. He no longer loves her. He is leaving her for his mistress. She gets mad, yells, and walks out of the room. That night they do not speak. She has time to think. She too makes a choice.  She wants nothing from him. Not his company. His money. His possessions.
She just asks that he put it off for one month.  Their son’s exams are coming up and she wants him to do well.
He agrees.
Then she asks for one favor. During that month could he remember the night they were married? How he carried her across the threshold? Could he humor her and carry her from the bedroom door to the front door like that for the month?
He agrees. For the sake of a peaceful month.
The walks are clumsy at first. Not knowing how to hold her. What to do. But they become progressively more intimate. The smell of her hair. The softness of her cheek. How long has it been since he has truly looked at this woman?savvy-quote-if-you-dont-like-your-life-make-better-choices
They don’t speak. Just walk.
She asks for nothing else. Puts no other conditions on their relationship. And so on the last day as he runs up the steps to his mistresses door and knocks the words “I am not getting a divorce” leave his lips.

There is no right or wrong choice in life. It is a choice. Our choices depend on our life experiences and what we believe will make us happy. Our choices will teach us life’s lessons.
You have to decide what makes you happy. What you’re willing to sacrifice. Which story you would rather be a part of. Which ending you want.
For me…whichever my story I want it always be filled with love. And without regrets.

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Without change there would be no butterflies!!

imagesThese past few weeks I have been making calls and getting activities sponsored for kids through All Love Always Charity so they can see the beauty and joy of this amazing life. One of the contacts I made has been super sweet, amazing and just really helpful about getting stuff done with her company.

We spoke the other day and she shared some terrible news with me.
She said…
Between meeting you and now my father past away and I have a 5 year old half sister who I am now responsible for. If we hadn’t met I wouldn’t even know there were any programs out there that she could be a part of and that could help her. I will definitely be contacting you.

I am so very sorry for her loss and for the loss of her half sisterimages

But I am so glad that I chose this path. Because I  just helped one person that I wouldn’t have otherwise helped. I am so glad that I enlarged my circle of possibility and opened a door that I had never opened before and found myself in the middle of this new possibility!
Isn’t that what we all aspire to? To make changes. Whether it’s in someone else’s life or our own. Don’t we all want to make a change? Open up an unrealized and unexpected possibility?

imagesMove forward. Make one change in your life today. Dare to do something you have never done before. Go to the local coffee shop and strike up a conversation with someone sitting next to you. Sign up for a class you never would. Do something so grand, so different from your norm that it excites you. It doesn’t have to be big. It just has to be big for you. And choose to enjoy it. Really enjoy it!  Make it something that gives you butterflies and makes you tingle with excitement! It won”t be the same for everyone. We are all on different paths of our journey. Make it something right for you and soar with it! Find something that puts a smile on your face and happiness to your heart!


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miscommunication

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I opened up my blog and found a comment in my about me page. I love getting comments. It’s great feedback about how people interpret your writing, it’s a great way to connect and learn about others, and it’s a great way to have two way communication!

This particular comment said…
…Great to read about what you are doing! Know that God loves you and He will strengthen you.

I stared at it for a while.
Reread what I wrote
And then stared at it some more…. God will strengthen me? In my endeavor? In my being? How would he strengthen me? Why? I thought I was clear. I am not sad. I am not grieving. I believe life is beautiful. I have been strengthened. It is the strength that makes me want to go out and share. So that no matter where you are in life and what you have gone through you can realize that life is to be lived in the moment. That life is truly beautiful, and joyful, and full of wonder. That we are here to enjoy life.

Was that not coming across? This was to be a page was about hope and inspiration. At least that is how I saw it because I feel hopeful and inspired and that is what I wanted to pass on.

Now I was just confused and in need of some good editing.

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Miscommunication happens everyday in the workplace, with children, friends, parents…

In the real world our meaning is perceived not only by the words used but also the way we dress, the way we carry ourselves, and the way we choose to say the words we say. In the written word it is just letters on a paper. Hopefully they are arranged in a way that gives away our true meaning. However, we could be great writers without being great speakers. (If good at conviction) We could be great speakers and not great writers. The two are not mutually inclusive. The goal is to merge themo and be great at both while still being true to ourselves.

How do you keep communication real, open and positive while still being true to yourself?

Truly communicating with another from a real place allows for the greatest sense of joy. That includes allowing them to be exactly who they are while being exactly who you are. And enjoying the interaction. You will never be understood by everybody. Jesus couldn’t do it, Gandhi couldn’t do it, Pope John Paul II couldn’t do it… and one would think the message of love and kindness should be universally understood. Everyone gets misunderstood.

So next time you try to communicate. Remember not everyone will understand you. Not everyone will agree with you. Not everyone will be moved by you in the way you believe your words to be moving. Be happy they are moved. Be happy you are you. Be happy you have shared from your own inner strength. But acknowledge they will see things from the path they have traveled to get here and the words they have heard. Realize this and work on being heard the way you want to be heard. Learn from mistakes and become better.

But always have more faith in who you are than in who others tell you to be.

When you close your eyes find who you are in your happiest moments and be that person.

Then you will be inspired… by you.

And inspiring… to others.


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Yes to struggles! Yes to possibility!

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I went to see my friends wife’s show at the supper club last friday night.It was an  amazing performance with ropes, acrobatics, stilts, musicians…

You have to work really hard to become that amazing. Practicing. Falling. Picking yourself up again.  Then once you get that level it takes hours of daily training to stay that way.

Effortlessness takes practice. Saying yes even when it is hard. Even when you are not sure of the outcome. Saying yes to the journey.

No matter what choices you make in life it is always about saying yes to the possibility. Whether you are an amazing athlete, scientist, entertainer, hero in your cause or amazing parent raising your children.

At the beginning of the journey you never know whether or not it will work out. Everyone struggles.frog

I struggle as a parent to find balance in bringing up my daughter to be healthy, happy, and herself while creating boundaries.  But not limiting who she is.

I struggle with my charity. It is new and we are just starting out. There are so many reasons it could fail. That it could be a waste of time and not make a difference. Besides, who am I to think myself so bold.

But what is so huge in the world that should make me think that I am not allowed?

There is not a person right now that has done amazing things that came into this world any differently than I. They were once a baby. They learned to talk. To laugh. To live. They struggled and overcame to make a difference. No matter how much money they have or their family connections they lived in the world of saying yes to what they wanted to achieve.

Maybe they came from more money. Maybe they came from a world of more opportunity.
But for every person who started out wealthy there is a Maya Angelou who overcame great hardships.
For every person who came from more opportunity there is a Mother Teresa, known all over the world for helping others.

When the world says no you are not worthy of the grandeur of your thoughts I tell it that it is being silly. I might struggle but I will try and I will always see the possibility of yes in everything. It is reflected in the happiness of my soul. In the way my heart skips a beat and jumps for joy.

The world may say you are asking too much. You are dreaming too big. You are aiming too high. I say maybe, but why shouldn’t I?

So as I take steps every day in moving forward.With All Love Always. With Life. Some steps are small. Some you might not even notice. But they move me in the right direction.In bringing to light all the possibilities I have.

There will be people who say no. And  no is ok.  It makes me rethink things, try harder, and do things differently. It makes me learn something about making my dreams even better. And then I meet the people who say yes. Yes, let’s make something happen.
But for my life to be what I want only one person has to say yes…

ME

If I want to be happy it  takes me.
Life is too beautiful and too short and too full to listen to no!


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Happiness in our own light

8483364696_f813255111_oI went to a networking dinner last tonight. It was a small enough event where we all had  chance to introduce ourselves and share briefly what we were there for. After the speech we had a chance to mingle. A woman came up to me. Very nice and well intentioned I’m sure, and told me that I didn’t sell myself enough. That I didn’t discuss with enough detail what I was about. I thanked her and told her I enjoyed what she had shared. She wasn’t being malicious and I am sure she had the best of intentions.
Then I went on to talk to the people sitting near me. I met some amazing people and had lengthy conversations about everything from what we did, to our kids, to what we were persuing in life.
The woman who had walked up to me was correct. Selling myself in a public forum is not what sings most loudly in my heart. I don’t have  a problem getting up and making a presentation after years of teaching and performing in theater. But  selling myself in that sort of venue is not my strong point. 
Wouldn’t it be boring if we all did things exactly the same way. Our happiness comes from who we are as individuals, not in being someone who we are not to please the crowd. Perhaps I did not sell myself as much as I could have. But that didn’t stop me from meeting people and making real bonds and connections in ways more enjoyable to me. Being true to myself allowed me to be true in the moments where it counted because I was happy with who I had been during the whole experience. It allowed me to make real connections without putting on a facade.
Finding our true inner voice. The one that speaks from our hearts is where the true inner happiness and peace of our soul presides. Our strength and happiness comes from following the voice of who we are as individuals with determination and perseverance not following the crowd. Don’t be afraid to shine. Just shine in your own light and not someone else’s.


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About me

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…welcome to my blog.

Life is full of unexpected changes. Changes measured by experience and  attracted by fate/ adversity. Experiences that have shaped our future. The impact of those experiences is defined solely by the ability of our imagination.

The biggest change in my life happened three and a half years ago when my husband died unexpectedly of a heart attack at 34 and life would never be the same.  There would be no more loving conversations, gazes, no more soft and tender kisses. My true best friend for life was gone. That future was changed forever. That’s the part that was hardest to come to terms with. The knowledge that life moving forward would be without him and his love.

It took a great deal of self-reflection and self-conversation about the true value of life to move on. To realize that life comes from inner happiness and knowing the treasure every day is what you do with the time between going to bed and waking up. That it is solely up to you!

I have been so blessed in my life. To live it from a place of happiness!

That’s why I started the All Love Always charity.  I want  children who have lived through loss to find a way to live in a place of happiness and beauty. Grief is a natural part of loss but seeing the beauty and joy in the world and experiencing that is what it’s all about! Life is about living and moving forward. It’s about loving every moment you are alive and sharing that love. For me it’s the value of humanity that holds the strongest bonds of why we are here. The value of laughter, friendships, seeing the beauty of the world and what it has to offer.

Death is a reminder of how truly preciouse life is. How beautiful it is. How every moment is to be lived fully. Without hesitation.

It is better to live and make mistakes than not do anything!
To experience and to feel. Not to be numb and protected from life. The journey is in the living to the fullest. And in sharing life from a place of true love with those around us. Life is too short to hold grudges, to dwell on what others think, or to be stuck in a place of  no.
I believe in loving deeply and having the courage to throw caution to the wind.
And in making the world better. Putting a smile on someone’s face today for tomorrow is never guaranteed!

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What brings me the most joy?…

First and foremost I am a mom…
I love my daughter and schedule work life so that mine is the first face she sees outside her classroom door and kisses goodnight
I love deeply passionate people who never say no to any possibility
I love the All Love Always charity and the great potential it has to help kids

I don’t believe in labels and although you could call me a widow I prefer being thought of as a person, a woman, a girl, and a liver of life…

Please take a moment to support the charity and like us on Facebook 🙂

Have a beautiful day and enjoy it to the fullest!